Horrors Vs Wonders
by BioluminescentGirl
Summary: In a world gone dramitically crazy, can our five  now six  favorite monsters hold on to their sanity long enough to save the world again? And again? and AGAIN?
1. Monsters vs a Snail!

Monsters vs. aliens storyAsk anyone who's ever seen Monsters vs. aliens who their favorite character is. About 70% of the time the answer will be in the lineup is Susan, the lovable heroine, and I have to admit, was at first my favorite comes The Missing Link, rocking the audience with his hilarious super-ego. Dr. Cockroach is next, and my personal favorite. Sad attempts at humor get the audience giggling, and an excellent brain power leaves everyone none of them are who I'm writing about today. Today we'll look at the side of the story never considered. The ones who's always left out of team photos, and also the one who came closest to dying on the battlefield. I'm talking about that giant, lovable, Insectosaurus. We all know the story of the five monsters that saved the entire human race. Now it was time for the monsters to shine again, and each and every one of them had an equally hard role to play. This fight would not end as quickly as dun dunnnnnn...Insectosaurus dozed happily in his cage. He dreamed of flying over Paris. He dreamed of his four little friends, knowing they had his back- both theoretically and literally- as they clutched the bristly short fur that lined his spine. He dreamed of how they chatted excitedly about their last mission, in which they had not only saved the entire human race and the planet on which they lived, but also most likely the entire galaxy as well, if not more. He dreamed he saw a giant snail... What did the small old man call it? Escargantua, slowly crawling towards the city. This was a very lifelike dream. Was it a dream?...The snail was so much like him. Body blown out of proportion by nuclear residue. Heading towards the largest sign of life it could find, hoping someone would please just help it understand what had happened to it. Why was the world suddenly so strange and so small? And yet how did it feel so small and alone even as it towered above everything in sight?Pulling up short, Insecto refused to go further. The others, with their tiny voices, tried to reason with him, but he refused. He would not hurt another being who was already in such pain. He understood that sort of pain all to well to charge forward as the others wanted him too. Not in his his path, he landed a couple miles outside of the city, far enough away that they would stay away until he was done. He flew swiftly and left them there, heading back to the snail. "Follow me" he bellowed softly. The snail didn't reply, of course. Snails cant talk, after all!But they do headed away from Paris, making to get to a place far away where no lights shone. Now they rested, silently, and Insectosaurus wondered vaguely what would happen next.

Dun, dun dunnnnn…Just go ahead and ask Derek Dietl what happened to his fiancé. But don't expect a strait answer. Depending on who you are, his story will you perhaps a future employer? Ah, my Pooches! I miss her so much! The government forbade me from ever seeing her again! -weeps-A reporter? Oh, Susan. Well she's on to bigger and better things. She dumped me the first chance she got. She broke more than just my heart, but my arm guy on the street? What fiancé?Absolutely none of these stories are remotely true. Except one. Susan really is on to bigger (definitely bigger) and better 's started to let her courage shine a bit more since that fateful day. She didn't need a man to give her happiness. She held a large dose of it close to her heart everywhere she she was not happy dun dunnnn..."What is he doing?" she asked Link for the millionth time. For the millionth time Link didn't know. For some strange reason his answer didn't change if she asked again, and again...Frustration curled off of her like smoke as she humphed and sat heavily on top of the nearest sat awhile, recollecting herself, and then she looked up again. The sun had moved too far on the sky for her liking. They would have to leave soon if they wanted to be back to the States by morning, since their ride ditched them. Since she was the fastest, Ginormica scooped up the others and ran with them to the edge of the city. She stopped dead in her tracks and looked up to see Insectosaurus flying back to them. Behind him Escargantua followed obediently. Insectosaurus bellowed in his usual way. Link chuckled."Looks like we've got a new recruit!"Dun dun dunnnnnn...A long time ago, before the experiment that changed his life, Dr. Cockroach PhD wasn't too different than your everyday science nerd. He was brilliant, creative and clever. His dreams were just as big as his brain, and he worked day and night to accomplish them. But there was one thing that set him apart from anyone else, one of the things about, well anyone really, that is often overlooked. was his motive when he stepped into that machine so calmly, so collectively, not knowing what could happen? Why on Earth would he want to do something that could have serious side effects, possibly even death? What sort of task would you want to accomplish so badly you were willing to put your life on the line for it to merely be a single step closer to completion? Only one person could possibly know, and he hasn't told us why he did it...Dun dun dunnnn...Perched on Ginormica's shoulder, Cockroach studied Escargantua as it slowly caught up to them. It was quite a fascinating creature, very much like Insectosaurus. Genes mutilated in a nuclear catastrophe. Enormous, powerful giant. Yes, quite an interesting specimen. Not that he was really interested in zoology. Maybe he might try a few experiments on it though, ... That is if he had the creature's permission... He may be mad but he was civilized, at least…

Anyway, he was excited to have a new recruit on the team, as they all were. Even Susan, err, Ginormica, had let go of her frustration and anger when Link retold Insecto's story. At first they all had bombarded the snail with questions, until Insecto bluntly pointed out that snails can't talk.

"Why not?" Su- Ginormica had wanted to know. Cockroach had to admit to some curiosity on the subject as well. But Insecto simply looked at her as if she was crazy.. Well, at least I thought so. I've never been able to decipher that poker face myself.

The now slightly larger group of monsters began to make their way back to the city. Cockroach sought out a phone booth to call for a ride, seeing how their newest member couldn't ride with them on Insecto. However, nobody would pick up when he called. He tried every American number he knew (which to me truthful wasn't all that elaborate. Only necessity numbers.) but could get hold of no one overseas.

Finally deflated, he started to return to the rest of the gang and tell them they would be spending the night in France. No one would be too upset about spending a night in one of the most famous cities in the world. But they would be as concerned as he was about not being able to get a hold of anyone…

He happened to walk past a shop on his way back, just as the door opened. Two Frenchwomen out on a shopping spree walked past him as they emerged, speaking quick French. Fortunately, Cockroach was fluent in the language, and managed to work out what was being said.

"It's insane what the president has done over there! Have you heard at all?"

"No! What's happened?"

"They say he was upset about his career. Afraid people would resent his decision to free the monsters. So the madman went and loosed nuclear bombs on his own country!"

As the women had continued walking, the strolled out of earshot of Cockroach, but he had heard enough.

Running like the Flash to camp, he cried out breathlessly,

"The United States is under attack of nuclear bombs!"

**Hey everyone! Here's that new story I promised. More to come soon, I promise. But for now, sit tight, leave a review, and get ready for the most dramatic, ridiculous, out of this world story I've ever written! (It will be awesome! -Grins evilly-)**


	2. Monsters vs Bad News

Horrors vs. Wonders

Have you ever met BOB? If you've ever seen him on the street, or said hi as you walked past, he most likely considers you one of his best friends. If you haven't, well you must be a friend he just hasn't made yet.

It doesn't really matter that he's brainless and is usually the last to figure out anything, because for some reason people still love him. But why do they love him so much if he's that stupid?

It's because he has a big heart, and that's more than you can say about most people, however smart.

Dun dun dunnnn...

Everyone around the camp gasped, except for the snail (snails can't gasp, of course. But giant butterflies can). BOB looked as if he would faint.

"What are we going to do?" he asked Cockroach.

"I," Cockroach started to reply. "I don't know"

"I'll tell you what we're going to do," Link said in a low voice. He turned to face the others. "We're going to get back there, find the bombs, and we're going to take them down!"

"But how are we going to get back?" BOB asked with a wide eye.

"I can help you with that," said General W. R. Monger from behind them.

Dun dun dunnnn...

General W. R. Monger was always a tough nut. He'd fought wars, captured monsters, and recently played a role in saving the Earth. Even more recently, he had managed to get across the border undetected during a national emergency.

His greatest accomplishment was helping the monsters held in area fifty...

Sorry. I almost slipped. Just woke up.

Anyway, his greatest accomplishment was helping the monsters fight off Gallaxhar, the insane alien who had recently tried to kill off the human race and repopulate Earth with his own clones. Monger had been so happy he could've cried, if he hadn't lost his tear guts in the war...

Dun dun dunnnn...

Monger studied the group of shocked monsters, standing solidly as a statue the whole time.

Ginormica was the first to recover. "How did you get here, General?"

"I'll tell you later. Right now, I need you to come with me back to America."

They loaded onto the giant plane. All except for Insecto and the Snail. Insecto could fly back but Snail was going to have to wait until a plane large enough for him could be secured. "Don't worry," Monger said to the snail before they departed. "I called the Paris PD. Told em' not to shoot at you."

With that our heroes were off, and after a few hours and one loooong bathroom break when they got back (Monger wouldn't stop along the way), they were back in the states and ready for action. Or, so they thought.

Dun dun dunnnn...

The amazing thing about the President of the United States is his bravery, or, more accurately, his ability too keep a cool head in stressful situations.

For example, when the alien robot sent by our favorite alien landed on American soil, the President was the first to step to close too it. Even when the robot tried to kill him, he responded not by screaming, but by shooting with the rest of his army until the Secret Service had too literally carry him onto a chopper. He kept a cool head in every situation.

But even though he remained calm, he knew what he could and could not do. He could fearlessly approach a giant alien robot. He could lead a country during an extraterrestrial attack. He could not, however, stop every nuclear missile the military had.

Now THAT was a stressful prospect. He turned to his favorite way of relieving stress. He grabbed a cup of Joe, then turned to Wilson.

"Willson, fire somebody!"

"Yes sir, Mr. President."

The president gulped down his coffee. Ah, much better.

Dun dun dunnnn...

Awhile ago.

"Who wants to freeze my head?" asked the President. He looked around for any volunteers. There were no takers.

Everyone started talking at once. "If those things reach a populated area, there will be a major catastrophe!" "We need out top scientific minds on this. Get India on the phone."

"Mr. President, it's dire times like these I stop and ask myself, what would Oprah do?"

As always, Monger was the one to come up with the best solution. As always, it involved monsters.

The President jumped on the idea.

So Monger was sent to retrieve the monsters. Meanwhile, the president and his 'advisers' (cough, nerds, cough) stayed and tried to delay the missile launch.

The President was now on his fifth cup of coffee and had fired at least three people. He was just about ready to quit. "Oh, hang it all! What's the point?" He was going to grab yet another cup of coffee when he heard a cheer go up.

"They're here! The monsters have arrived!"


	3. Monsters vs Nuclear Weapons

Link often felt cold since he was unfrozen, a common side effect to hypothermia. Another common side effect is death.

But then, people have survived stranger things.

For this reason (and other quite obvious ones) he totally supported global warming. And by totally, well, the first thing he said after finally getting outside after fifty years was: "It feels a little hotter than I remember. Has the Earth gotten warmer? It would be great to know that. A very convenient truth."

But even for someone frozen in ice for thousands of years, the heat of nuclear missiles was pushing it just a little too far.

Dun dun dunnnn...

"I'm gunna turn those tin cans into reeeeally dented tin cans" Link said as he watched the approaching missiles. Ginormica knelt down to talk to them.

Together, the monsters came up with a plan. But, to carry out that plan, they needed one more monster.

"Okay," said Link. "Does anyone have a 21 on Insectosaurus?"

The missiles inched closer until they were forced to start without Insecto.

Ginormica jumped on top of the closest missile, using her wheight to force it to the ground, doing a sort of twisting thing to position herself under the missile and catching it before it could hit the ground and explode.

Link and BOB teamed up. BOB would use his elastic body to toss Link into the air. Link then would perform a move similar to Ginormica's. But in this case, BOB caught both the missile and Link, placing them on a growing stack of missiles. Dr. Cockroach was busy deactivating all of them so they wouldn't blow up.

The monsters worked swiftly, but not swiftly enough.

"They're are too many of them!" said Ginormica. The others looked up and admitted that she was right. They needed Insecto to help them.

As if on cue, a huge flying object flew towards them. BOB cheered and Ginormica let out a sigh of relief.

But it wasn't Insecto approaching.

Dun dun dunnnn...

Escargantua loved small places. Simply LOVED them. What better place to hide from a French chef than a little cranny he couldn't reach into? So naturally, he highly enjoyed the trip in the little airplane, especially since he was leaving the place where he was considered a delicacy for a place where people gagged at the thought of eating something like him.

He had heard a lot about America. It sounded like a wonderful place, full of tall buildings and places to hide. Many French children in the schoolyard where he had lived would chat excitedly about visiting the country someday.

And now he himself was going there, to live among monsters like him.

It was the happiest day of his life.

And then he saw the missiles trying to destroy his new paradise.

Dun dun dunnnn...

Escargantua raced out of the plane and onto the battlefield. Well, he tried to anyway. Nobody could blame him for being a snail.

He saw that the others were failing and quickly took his place among them. He grabbed missiles out of the air and place them on the pile. But still, the monsters fell behind.

Escargantua realized that this fight could not be won without a huge sacrifice. He was prepared to make it.

He swallowed every nuclear missile in his path, eating them. They didn't taste very good, but they were gone anyway. Feeling proud of himself, he gobbled up more and more.

Suddenly, Cockroach realized what he was doing. "Nooooo!" he yelled. Too late.

The giant snail felt a horrid sensation in his stomach. It felt as if he would explode...

Dun dun dunnnn...

Ginormica turned to see Escargantua fall to the ground, shaking in pain. "Everyone move! He's going to blow!"

And blow is exactly what he did. With one final, violent shake, Escargantua opened his mouth wide, and belched so hard it could be felt by people in Japan as a small breeze. The nuclear radiation was released as harmless snail saliva.

The monsters were thrown back through the air. When the finally regained their bearings, they realized what had happened and were silent with astonishment.

Finally, BOB came to his senses. "Wooo! Yeah! Go snail man!"

Soon everyone was cheering for Escargantua. The snail would have looked sheepish, if they could show emotion, that is.

Insectosaurus finally arrived, and when he learned what had happened, he too congratulated Escargantua on his quick thinking. All was well once more.

Oh yeah. They still had to deal with the president.

Dun dun dunnnn…


	4. Monsters vs the President

Monsters vs the president!

_Hey, so I finally got my computer! (Read my profile for more info) Here's the next chapter!_

After another long, bladder staining trip, the posse of monsters reached Washington D.C. Spectators cheered as they passed, both for old accomplishments and for the newest success, news of which already spreading like the plague.  
>Reporters swarmed the group as they struggled to get to the White House. Ginormica, Escargantua, and Insectosaurus had the worst of it, none of them wanting to trample somebody by accident. Insecto was forced to take to the sky eventually, while the other two had to make due on the ground.<br>Eventually, they made it to the White House.

"Mr. President, we have a bone to pick with you," said Cockroach.  
>The President looked up from where he sat in his Oval Office. Susan, er, Ginormica stood outside the window.<br>The president looked up from his desk, where his feet had been resting on a few important papers. Quickly, he scrambled to his feet and awkwardly stood facing the gang.

By the end of the day, the Vice President was the President, and the President sat in jail.  
>A crowd of ten million people stood outside as President Howard was sworn into office.<br>"So help me God," he said, and the crowd cheered.

Ten miles away, the monsters lounged in a presidential safe-house, watching the events on TV. Nobody really wanted to watch it, but Sus... Ginormica had the remote and nobody was willing to take her on for it. Nobody had really wanted to see the President thrown in jail, after all, he was a nice guy. He was the one who had granted them their freedom, and anyone could have made a mistake like that.  
>But it was a mistake too huge to be forgiven. The public screamed for his immediate arrest.<br>The screen went black as Susan, I mean, Ginormica shut it of, but not before it flipped through about 49 different channels. Her big fingers just couldn't seem to hit the right button on the first try.  
>Dead silence filled the room.<br>"Well, I'm going to bed," said Link casually, stretching and standing up. The others just nodded and also headed into their separate rooms for the night.

Later that night, BOB crept out of bed and back into the den. He turned on the television and flipped to channel 60, Disney channel. He stayed up late watching High School Musical, and also singing along to a few songs.  
>Then he went to bed again, smiling. He had already forgotten about the previous day completely.<p>

**REVEIW OR ELMOS WILL FIND YOU AND STARE AT YOU WHILE YOU SLEEP SORT OF LIKE EDWARD CULLEN BUT WITHOUT THE PRETENSE OF BEING ROMANTIC.**


	5. Monsters vs Hair

Chapter five  
>Monster's vs. Hair<p>

_Sorry for not updating sooner! Here's the chapter. Also, if you are unsatisfied with this chapter, I don't blame you. Well... You'll see. Feel free to flame if you want, but do know I plan to update sooner than last time!_

Ginormica woke up first, here yes blackened by a night filled with tossing and turning. She felt so... Guilty. The president hadn't meant to do those things, and he certainly shouldn't be in a position of power if he would continue to make these mistakes... But these arguments didn't seem to convince her. Mr. Hathaway, as nobody ever seemed to refer to him as, though it was his name, was a big goofball. He was brave, friendly, anything you would want in a president save that he was naive. Should he be condemned to prison for that? Forced to sit in a cell forever? Alone? 

Ginormica sighed and sat up on her bed, rubbing her sleepy, crusted eyes with her fingers.  
>She walked over to the end of her room, picking up a brush and combing her white hair. However, as she combed, nothing happened. her hair did not straighten and flow nicely, but stayed tangled. She groaned as she looked at the brush. It seemed Dr. Cockraoch had pulled out the last of the plastic things to use as "Tessla coils". Honestly, you would think he would have given up after the first few melted.<p>

Or maybe the fault lay with Link. He was probably using them as bench presses. Trying to make everyone think he was cool by looking as if he lifted a lot of wheight although it was only plastic.

Or maybe it was BOB. He might have wanted to se how it tasted and then decided he liked the taste and ate the rest as well.

Ginormica was about to point fingers in other directions before she realized the theft was caused by her own hair, which was so snarled it had pulled the little plasic things right from the brush. Great. Now she looked even more bed-headed. _And_ she would have to be seen like this as she quested for a new hairbrush.

Unfortuneatly, she never even got that chance as Cockroach burst into her room. "Susan!" he yelled. "I have a plan! A plan to get Mr. Hathaway out of prison!"

**REVEIW OR ELMO WILL FIND YOU AND WATCH YOU WHILE YOU SLEEP SORT OF LIKE EDWARD CULLEN BUT WITHOUT THE PRETENCE OF BEING "ROMANTIC".**


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